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Experienced switch male - never enuf! Looking for "real", not fantasy

I'm looking for a firm person that won't let me get away with nonsense, and someone who I can benefit spiritually and physically. Most of my scene time has been as a Dom, then I got curious about what my subs were attracted to and experiencing. Still learning :) Peek experience so far is being kidnapped to a gay resort for a weekend. Notable quote I overheard: "You mean there's a WOMAN here!?"

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Crossdressing

I preferVersatile
Been with a crossdresserNo

Sex Preferences

OutOnly close friends know
HIV StatusNegative

Public Sex preferences

Favorite public sex places:Well, I moved here from Florida a few years ago, and there were a few places like the Woodshed in Orlando, but I cut my teeth in the NYC clubs - especially the dear departed Vault. Not sure that's responsive - "sex" to me IS BDSM.
The riskiest place I've had a sexual encounter:A parking lot near the Rutgers admin building.

Appearance

EthnicityCaucasian / White
National heritageUkrainian
BuildSlim
Height180 cm
Eye ColorHazel
Hair ColorSalt and pepper
Hair LengthShoulder length
Facial HairShaved
Best featureHands
Body ArtNone
Health ConditionDiabetes
Endowment (length)Very long
Endowment (width)Thick
CircumcisedNo
My AttractivenessAttractive

Situation

Relationship StatusMarried
Has childrenChildren don't live with me
Wants kidsNo
Housing SituationAll is calm
Wants to RelocateNo
Has a carYes

Education & Employment

EducationUniversity Masters
SpecialtyComputers / Electronic
Employment StatusRetired
Job Titleunappreciated code-slinger - senior level

Looking For

I prefer:Humor, Sensitivity, Boldness, Wit
My perfect matchPerfect match!? There are many combinations of traits that would fit that bill for me. However, right now, I'm focused on experiencing things I've never before tried. So a person with some "devil may care" attitude, insistence on having things His or Her way, and somewhat of a risk-taker/adventurer. They'd not be shy about correcting me, or simply using me for their own purposes. Obviously, this would be a person that has a good idea of what they want, even tho the "details" may not be clear.
Our first dateWhatever He or She wants to do to better understand if I'll be a good match for them. Traditionally, sharing a meal is almost a cliché, but I do cook a bit and would be happy to he asked to arrange that part for the meet. Ideally, in a completely private setting, after some time in a public venue.

BDSM Preferences

I'm turned on byA combination of all
My role isSwitch
I am seekingA relationship
I live the lifestyleOnly when I can
Experience levelIntermediate
I enjoyBondage, Branding, Breast / nipple torture, Candle wax, CBT (cock & ball torture), Confinement / caging, Cross dressing, Genital torture, Hot wax, Kidnapping, Needle play, Physical humiliation, Power exchange, Verbal humiliation, Whipping
Open To Photos & VideosDepends on the partner
My most pleasurable encounter wasten years ago, a new friend conspired with my then girlfriend to kidnap me for the weekend. She had rented a room at a gay resort in Florida and spent days preparing it to keep me prisoner. It lasted two and a half days.

Fetishes

FetishesCrossdressing, High Heels

Sexual Activities

Most partners at once:Only one on one
Night life:Fetish clubs, Dungeon clubs, Raves, Don't like going out

Sexual Interests

CybersexNo, I need the real thing
Sex toys:Butt plugs/probes
Size matterSometimes, depends on the person
"Off Limits":Can't answer this - it's a moving target. Initial limits get revised as the relationship grows

Sexual Fantasies

Sexual fantasyI got to talking with a Dom at a club in Florida, and She mentioned that She trained her subs to respond to voice command whether they should get hard or go soft. She said it was lots of fun watching the agony in a public space while he had a restrictive chastity on and She commanded that he get hard. Didn't get any details, but I've got a fair idea what it would take. It would be "difficult", as She said. Control of my sex draws me, and scares the daylights out of me. Yes, with a person where deep trust is established, I'd very much like to gift that to the Dom.
Fantasy sex partner:I don't understand the question

Femdom Preferences

Intensity level:Depends on my mood
I'm seeking:Long Term relationships with play
Desired Persona:Changes with my partners
I like to wear:High heels and a business suit, Lingerie and stockings, Corsets, Leather
Ideal session:No way to answer, cuz it all depends on Her - personality, interests, etc